3 THINGS I'VE LEARNED IN 2020
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See ya 2020…
Don’t let the door hit you in the behind.
Seriously. What a year.
What I’ve realized over the past few weeks, especially after having the virus impact us directly, is that everyone is going through this in a different way.
Some of my friends have been alone since the very beginning…
Others have spent so much of their time on the front lines…
Others have lost friends or family members, jobs, homes, etc.
But, no matter how you swing it, this year has been one I think most of us will never forget.
One of the things I like to do at the end of each year is take some time reflecting on the GOOD parts of the year. Sometimes, it’s just with those Top 9 photos you get to post on Facebook. Other times, it’s been looking at my posts throughout the year.
This year, I thought I’d share with you the 3 things that I’ve learned in 2020 that I want to take with me into 2021…
>> Focus on the things you can control - and be willing to let go of the things you can’t.
As someone who is a Type A perfectionist, it is HARD for me to not want to control everything. In fact, part of what I do in my business is do the things that most people can’t. I like to joke that I’d rather just do it for my clients instead of teach them how to do it.
In other words, I REALLY like control.
One thing 2020 has taught me is that I’m not in control of every aspect of my life. I mean, what do you do when your kids (and EVERYONE else in the world) are stuck at home for weeks + months at a time? You can’t go anywhere or do anything - and you have no say in the matter.
Y’all, that’s HARD on a perfectionist control freak like myself. I like to have my days completely planned out so when it goes out the window, it’s easy to start feeling overwhelmed.
But, this past year, I’ve had to learn how to let go of the things I can’t control. Is it easy? Not at all. But, it takes the edge off a little.
>> Communication is key to your relationships.
So, I’m sure this is pretty obvious for a lot of people, but besides being a perfectionist, I’m also very internal. Communicating is not exactly my strong suit (which is why I default to writing…).
I also really don’t like having hard conversations or getting vulnerable with people who might not agree with everything I have to say.
However, 2020 has forced me to communicate - and do it well + often. When you’re stuck in your house 24/7 with the same 3 people for months on end and everything is completely different than what you are used to, you have to have an open line of communication at all times.
Am I good at having hard conversations or opening up about everything that’s on my mind? Nope. But the more I do it, the better I’m getting at it.
It also helps to remind myself daily that, “I am learning to handle judgement in a healthy way.” This is one of my main anchor thoughts that helps me to be more open in my communication. I plan on continuing to use this anchor thought throughout 2021 to keep improving in my communication.
>> Find gratitude in the little moments.
When life feels hard and nothing is going your way, I remind myself that what I focus on grows. So, those mornings when I’m running late, rushing out the door, forgot to pack the kids’ lunches, and they’re also whining, if I continue to focus on all those negative things, I’m going to keep “attracting” negative things into my life.
Is it easy to stop focusing on the negative? Not one bit. But, by CHOOSING to find the little things to be thankful for, my days feel lighter + more positive.
For example, when we learned we were going to be quarantined on Thanksgiving and would miss out on Thanksgiving dinner with my immediate family - our first one with them in 3 years - I could’ve focused on how upset and disappointed I was. But instead, I found the positive things in the circumstances.
That we were still able to cook dinner to share with my family, even though we couldn’t be with them.
That they brought us Thanksgiving dinner, even though they definitely didn’t need to.
That we were able to spend the day together, just the 4 of us.
