Race Recap: Run to the Lights 5K 2018

My last race was December 30 of last year. It’s been almost an entire year since I’ve raced… and honestly, I don’t really have a good excuse as to WHY.The majority of this year, I have been heavily focused on my business goals (as you may have noticed) and I’ve been using that as an excuse that I can’t focus on 2 goals at once. Meaning, my running goals have taken a backseat. Which also lead to excuse after excuse as to why I didn’t NEED to do speed work or hit my splits, etc. I finally got to September and realized I was going to be doing this race regardless of if I was trained for it or not, but that I NEEDED to stop making excuses as to why I should get a “Get Out of Jail Free” card.Here’s the complete and honest truth…I WAS SCARED.2017 was my BEST year of running ever. I was training harder than I ever had and was seeing MASSIVE results. And then, I got injured. In fact, I’m still dealing with that injury on + off. While I recovered and could still run, things just weren’t the same. I wasn’t motivate. My body ached. I wanted to sleep more than I wanted to run. My head just wasn’t in it.And it had NOTHING to do with focusing on other goals. In fact, I NEEDED running to keep my focus on my big business goals. It was when I had my best ideas and changed my mindset.But, I was burnt out. In April, I got to the point where I was constantly exhausted. I finally got on some B-vitamins and overhauled my diet and started to finally see a difference. And since quitting my job in June and not waking up at the butt crack of dawn, I’ve obviously done really well on sleep.So, why was I still running horribly?Two weeks before the race I posted on Instagram about how I was still trying to decide if I wanted to actually race it. Because, like I said, I was scared. I wasn’t where I was at this time last year - not even close. But, a sweet soul commented and reminded me that I trained for this race. Regardless if it was my best or not, I had trained up to this point, so why was I going to throw that out the window?And she was absolutely right.It took A LOT of positive self-talk and a realization that it wasn’t worth being disappointed over my time, even if I knew it was going to be my worst time on the course ever. I was still going to give it my all and do what I trained for.I went in to the race knowing exactly what to expect. I know the course like the back of my hand, we’ve raced it so much. I know the hills, I know the mile markers, I know exactly what to expect as far as the course. And I knew what to expect as far as my time was concerned. I knew there was no way I was going to win (I haven’t done that since they moved it to the week after state cross country and all the high schoolers race it) and I knew I wasn’t going to run it as fast as I did last year (20:06 - my personal course record).  But, I knew that I could still pull out a decent time and it still probably wouldn’t be my worst 5K (which was admittedly something I ran too soon after my last marathon in 2010).This race wasn’t about anyone else. It wasn’t about placing or competition. It was to see where I was. It was step one to where my training can go. When you get to a certain age (aka over 30), you feel like a bad year of running means you’ve hit your peak and you’ll never get back to where you want to be. But, that’s certainly NOT the case. I’m an extremely healthy individual. I can most certainly run faster than I did 2 weeks ago.It’s not about AGE, no. It’s about EFFORT. It’s about MINDSET.So, as much as I planned on giving this awesome race recap (let’s see, my first mile was down hill and I used that to my advantage, settled into a pace during mile 2 and focused on catching the people in front of me, and mile 3 was all about finishing strong and not letting my head get to me), what I want to tell you is that you’re going to have shitty races. You’re going to have shitty runs, or shitty weeks, shitty months, or even a shitty year of running like I did.BUT…That doesn’t mean that you’ll never get back to where you were. That doesn’t mean that you suck at running.It just means you temporarily lost your focus. It means that you need to fix your mindset and remind yourself that you CAN have it all. You can focus on business goals + running goals at the same time. Or maybe you’re having a really tough time in your home life and that’s affected your running.I want to tell you…IT’S OK.It’s not the end of you. It’s not the end of your running. It’s not your peak. It’s a small setback and you’re turning over to a new chapter. You’re taking the first step to regaining your focus and falling back in love with running again.Give yourself some grace and remember WHY you love this sport. What does it do for you? Why do you push yourself day in + day out?Because, I promise you, once you realize this is only the beginning, you will start seeing BIG CHANGES in how you go in to each run.