TAKING BACK MY HEALTH IN 2020
Alrighty, friends, I’m going to get a little vulnerable here today…
I don’t talk about my health much because, well…
(1) it’s embarrassing for me to be someone with a background in health + fitness to feel like they’re health has taken and hit, and...
(2) I KNOW that I am NOT fat. I KNOW this. But, when your clothes start to not fit, you know that you’ve gotta make some SERIOUS changes to your health.
One thing I didn’t expect when I quit my job 18 months ago was for my health to take a major hit. I mean, I had my TIME back. I could workout longer if I wanted! The stress I felt from teaching + long commutes would be GONE.
But, the reality is, I was spending more hours in front of my computer than I care to admit. I went from 12-15K steps per day, to barely eeking out 10K.
And what happens when you move less and still eat the way you did when you weren’t sedentary?
Well, you gain weight.
But, this post isn’t just about gaining weight… this post is about regaining my HEALTH. Because not only did I gain 5-10 pounds over the last year, I also noticed significant changes to other parts of my body that I can only acknowledge were due to hormones.
I love being in my 30s, but these things are the things that definitely SUCK about getting older…
So here’s sort of a rundown of what’s happened over the past year…
>> I gained weight.
OK, so when I say I gained weight, most people probably wouldn’t even notice. But, I did. I noticed in the way my body looked. My arms were no longer toned + muscular. My “mom pooch” was more than just a pooch. I never had a “thigh gap” but my thighs were rubbing together a little more. And well, my pants were just a little harder to zip up.
Seeing myself in a bikini in pictures over this past year was rough. Like I said, no one else probably even noticed - shoot, I’m not even sure Matt noticed - but I could see it.
And my self-esteem took a major hit.
>> My workouts suffered.
I’ve finally accepted the fact that I’m not a competitive runner anymore. Gone are the days of meeting up with my running buddies for a long run on Saturday morning. Gone are the days of track workouts + strides + tempo runs.
But, it took a LONG time for me to accept that simply because I WANTED to still be that “fast girl” that I thought everyone saw me as.
But, I was burnt out. My body didn’t want to handle that load anymore - and mentally, I just wasn’t “in it” anymore.
But, I kept pushing and pushing and pushing myself to be that same runner I was. The same one who ran a 19:40 PR just 2 years ago. The same one who could run a sub-8 minute mile on a normal “easy” run.
I was pushing myself to do things I didn’t want to to do (physically or mentally), and my workouts suffered and I lost my passion for it.
Was I still working out? Of course - because, well, see bullet #1. But, it’s hard to stay consistent with something you’re totally burnt out on.
>> My hormones went WILD.
I can really chalk this up to a few things.
First, I’ve had my IUD in for 5 years. (Actually, over that amount of time now… oops.) So, I have a feeling it’s starting to lose its effectiveness. But, I could tell for the way my BODY was feeling.
Of course, weight gain was the first thing I noticed (I mean, I can’t say that was ALL hormonal though…). But, I also noticed changes in how I felt around that time of the month - even though I wasn’t having a period because of my birth control. My boobs ached like I was pregnant. I was exhausted and moody. And just an all-around unpleasant person to be around.
All 3 of these things happened in the last year, and by my 35th birthday in October, I KNEW I needed to make a change. Because if you want something to change, you actually have to take ACTION friends!
So, I know you’re on the edge of your seat going, “Well, what did you do?! Is it working?!”
Here’s what I’ve been doing to take back my health this year…
>> I “retired” from competitive running.
I took the pressure COMPLETELY off of myself on being a competitive runner. Like I said, I was BURNT OUT. Racing and doing anything more than an easy run just felt painful. So, I stopped pressuring myself to race because I felt like that made me a runner and just started running because I love it for my HEALTH. Funny how just shifting your mindset a little can have such a profound impact on your motivation.
>> I’m figuring out my hormones.
I’m not quite to this step yet, quite honestly, but one thing I did was read Woman Code by Alissa Viti, which put A LOT in perspective on steps I needed to take to take control of my crazy hormones. I’m going OFF birth control - not because I particularly want to because let me tell you how nice it is to have a period - but because I know that it is messing with my hormones A LOT. And I have a feeling it will have an impact on my mental health (namely, my depression) as well.
I’m also making it a point to get rid of the majority of toxic beauty products in my house. I had already accidentally taken care of this by switching my shampoo and styling products, but I’m also working on getting my makeup products switched over as well. There’s still A LOT of work to do as far as more natural food, but…
>> I’m going back to counting.
This is something I struggled with for AWHILE. I used to religiously count calories and restrict what I ate. At one point (11 year ago), I got down to my lowest weight of 111 pounds. That lasted all of a month before my weight went back to it’s natural, healthy point, but I was undereating and overexercising at the time.
I counted and binged and beat myself up for YEARS, until I got pregnant with MacKenna and stopped cold turkey and started just listening to my body.
But, like I said, when you go from having an extremely active job to a sedentary one and don’t make any changes to your diet, well, you gain weight.
I am NOT counting calories though. Instead, I had my macros (carbohydrates, proteins, and fats) calculated and personalized by a registered dietician. Now, I’m more focused on hitting my macro goals daily instead of my calories. Yes, I’m eating LESS calories than I probably was over the last year, but I’ve already noticed a difference in how my pants fit and my arms are looking a little more toned as well.
(Side note: Emily is a client of mine and I chose to have her do this for me because her areas of strength fit what I needed for my body. That might be different for you, but you can check out her personal macro calculations if you’re interested. I’m not getting compensated to send you to her - I just feel like this helped get me back on track.)
It’s also forced me to drink less alcohol. Matt + I decided not to do Dry January, but we had gotten to a point where we were having a beer a night, and that adds up - quickly. So, drinking is now only on the weekends. Some weekends I’ll have 5 beers, while others I might only have 1… it just depends, but I can definitely notice a difference just from this alone...
I have to remind myself - and you - that this is a MARATHON and not a sprint as far as taking back my health. But, in the 2 months since I’ve been focused on this, I’ve had more energy, my pants fit better, and I feel better overall. Once I get my hormones figured out, I think I’ll be well on my way to feeling more like, well, myself again.